top of page

Invisible Barriers & why toddlers struggle




We’ve had a stair gate installed on Jago’s bedroom doorway for the past three months. Why?  Because he wasn’t yet clear on how “invisible boundaries” worked after he began sleeping in a bed.


Let me explain…


We transitioned Jago from a cot to a bed when he was around 3 years and 9 months old. For a month or so after we did this, he was absolutely fine and wasn’t coming out of his bed or bedroom.



Then we had a random blip where he began waking at night, turning his light on in the middle of the night, coming out of his room, taking books out at 3 in the morning - the works!



Totally out of the norm for him, he'd slept through the night happily from 4.5 months old.



We actually weren’t clear if there was some sleep walking going on as a lot of the time he was moving around super quietly and would only get upset once we disturbed him.



So the stairgate was firstly, a safety precaution (we haven’t had a stairgate on our actual staircase for well over a year) and partly to put back in place a visible boundary for Jago in order to enable him – and us – to sleep well.



Some parents might look at this as harsh or cruel, but you have to remember – our little ones are used to having physical boundaries in the form of their cot, and having visible boundaries actually helps them to feel safe and secure.



Sometimes when toddlers move to a bed, their brains simply haven’t matured enough to understand that they have to stay in a place that doesn’t have physical barriers.



Even though we left it relatively late by society’s standards to transition Jago to a bed at 3yrs 9months, with hindsight I would have left it longer! There really is no reason to make this transition early. Don't listen to those well meaning grandparents!



Jago was totally happy in his cot, he hadn’t started climbing out and still had room to stretch out and sleep comfortably.



Just goes to show, even Sleep Consultants get it wrong sometimes! 😉



If you're struggling with your toddler coming out of their bedroom at night, consider using a stairgate.



Think of it as a boundary that allows your little one to focus on falling asleep when they need to and getting much needed rest. Much like their cot helped them to feel safe and comfortable, despite them technically being behind bars!



This is not a forever thing, a temporary thing whilst their brains catch up.  As you might've noticed, toddlers don't always know what's best for them!

Grab our free Extending Naps Guide below and let’s get those long, predictable naps happening on the daily:


Comments


Post: Blog2_Post
bottom of page